Green light to pregnancy

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The past few weeks had been full of waiting and praying and anticipating, career-wise and reproductive health-wise. Today, I'll be sharing about the latter. I've gone through a lot of examinations as instructed by my OB and Cardiologist. It took me more than a month to finish everything and last Thursday, I  finally got an answer.

The OB gave me the green light to start trying to get pregnant. Some of you might wonder why I even have to ask for an advice or permission from the experts as if getting pregnant is not ultimately the next thing to do after getting married. Well, folks, sorry to disappoint you but my case is different because I have a heart condition I had to get clearance for first, not to mention I also have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome which calls for close monitoring with regard to just about any activity involving my ovaries. OK that could be exaggerated but you get the picture.

Anyway, to be honest, I have been praying for everything to turn out fine and normal. After the tests, I learned that I'm fine but not normal, of course. I still have PCOS and sure still is a very special patient because of the heart condition. So special that when I asked my OB if it's possible for me to deliver via Lamaze or Bradley someday, without batting an eyelash, she immediately said no. She and my cardiologist, both. I was nodding and agreeing with them while they tell me "let's not push your heart's limit, OK?" but deep inside, my heart was breaking already, figuratively that is.

Then again, it's too early to worry about these things as hubby and I have come to a decision to take our time. I mean, it's just what? Five months since we got married. We barely even feel like a married couple yet. We still enjoy each other's alone time so much and we hope to still get the most out of it in the meantime. And let's face it, we could be more financially ready for another mouth to feed, not to mention that hospital bills for delivery are no joke nowadays. I did my research and I was just overwhelmed. It's like financing a wedding all over again. (Now that kinda gives you an idea on how much we spent for our wedding.)

Don't get me wrong. This is me not losing faith or anything. After preparing for a wedding which was only five months in the making through the savings which could barely cover a wedding cake, I have already reached that point of accepting that no human effort can outdo God's generosity and provision. He provides for His children no matter how impossible the situation is. It's tried and tested. He provides. Period.

I guess this is us trying to execute wisdom. I mean, once there's more than the two of you in the family, it's never ever going to be the same. Being a mother is not something you can switch off when you get tired and you need a break. No, it's life changing. I should know from mother-friends. I realized that once I become a mother, I'll forever have to juggle between being a mother to my baby, a wife to my other baby, while working full time. I'm not saying I'm not ready for that. Who's ready anyway? I just believe that when God decides to give us a baby, ready or not, He'll give us the grace to be ready and to do all the responsibility that comes with it. For now, we still enjoy the boyfriend-girlfriend peg, just the two of us. Although it's a little hard especially when you see friends getting pregnant and giving birth here and there. It makes you really want to have one for yourself on the spot.

Then again, there's a time for everything. God will soon bring us to the season of parenthood but for now, we're just really grateful for the season of marriage that He has brought us to and we're enjoying every minute of it. I'm very blessed to know that the Lord's timing is perfect and He will someday give us the descendants He even promised Abraham thousands of years ago in Genesis 17. That someday could be next month or next 2 years, who knows? This is one of the perks of waiting on God. He's a creative giver of blessing and when He blesses you, you know it's perfect beyond comprehension. You just really have to give Him your 101% of trust.

Romans 12:2 ...Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.