Friday, February 15, 2013

To my single friends out there..

(Operational definition of SINGLE = someone who is not married)

I just had to make this post because of a very random text message I got from a very close friend of mine. The message goes like this:

"..before mo pa makilala si Ralph single na ko. Ngayon ikakasal ka na.."
(before you met Ralph, I was single. Now you're already getting married [and I still am])

I don't know where this thought of her came from. Was it because yesterday was the infamous Single Awareness Day? Or because I'm getting married and most people didn't expect it to come this soon? Whatever the reason is, I think it's best for me to finally post my two cents on this matter.

WAITING IS NOT EASY. I myself made a vow that after the first immature ungodly high school relationship that I had back when I wasn't a Christian yet, the next relationship I'll have shall be with the man I'll marry someday. I was single for 6 years and if I'll be honest, it wasn't a piece of cake. I was tempted in every way. I even gave in to temptation of dating just for the sake of. There are so many things I regret which I just charged to experience. Though I don't remember Valentine's Days to be dreaded, I remember the feeling of wishing I have someone with me to get the groceries, watch movie, or even just to stroll in the park text "good morning, i love you" every day. 

PRAYING MAKES WAITING SHORTER. When I became a Christian, it didn't necessarily become easier for me 'cause I was just given another reason to be sad -- I don't have a boyfriend to attend Sunday services with while I see a lot of couple attendees surrounding me. The joy of worshiping the Lord with the person you love, ugh! Yes we have that tendency of noticing what others have that we don't. But one thing I learned in church is the cliche that God has a purpose for everyone and everything. Waiting wasn't less hard when I became a Christian but at least I learned and understood the value of prayer. When reading the bible became a habit, I became stronger in waiting. The bible speaks a lot about patience. Personally, waiting made me hopeful and the bible made me see every waiting period as an opportunity for my faith to level up. Not only did praying for the right person make me busy, it also helped me better myself as a Christian and a person in preparation to Mr. God-sent's arrival. Ladies, let's prep up so the right person will actually see us and won't just see through us when the time comes.

Psalm 33:20 "We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield."

WAITING IS WORTH IT. What makes waiting hard is the anticipation that what you're waiting for might not come. This is where the question of faith emerges. There were countless nights when I argued with the Lord and was tempted to just forget about this whole waiting thing and stop praying. But then I realized, I can't not pray because it's practically forgetting that there's a Lord above that loves to listen. And there was no assurance that Mr. Right will come sooner if I stop praying anyway. So I persevered. True enough, in God's time, Ralph showed up.

Romans 5:3-4 "..because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope."

Proverbs 19:14 "Houses and wealth are inherited from parents, but a prudent wife is from the LORD." 
(I believe this goes for husbands, too.)

GOD'S WILL IS BEST FOR US. Praying for our needs and wants is OK but I say praying for God's will is the best thing to do if we want to be secure. We might think we know what we want and like but trust me, God knows best. You might be praying for a certain type of guy, maybe someone with a car, a graduate of whatever university, must be good looking, a manager, with a certain height, et cetera but you'll never know he's perfect for you until God says so; and the only way for us to know what He has to say is by reading the bible. Bottom line is, just like praying for a promotion, higher salary, latest gadget, good grades, we pray specific prayers and always make sure that it's in accordance to God's will.

Romans 12:2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

To all my single friends out there, even Beyonce would agree with me when I say that if a guy loves you, he shoulda put an engagement ring and eventually a wedding ring on it. Let us be wise. Being alone does not always equate to loneliness. I can attest to the fact that most of the good things happened to me while I was single. Let's get busy while waiting-- excel at work, embrace more family time, join fellowship groups what will stand in prayer with us, and befriend more people who are of the same faith as ours (who knows one of them is The One?). Let's pray for the God's best to find you in God's time. Let's not rush into disposable relationships -- 'here and now' relationships. 

Lamentations 3:25 (KJV) "The LORD is good unto them that wait for him, to the soul that seeketh him."

God bless you, single person who's reading this.


  1. that's great read... thanks for sharing

  2. ..wait for the right man, right time at the right place..:)))


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